How Are You Going to Know What's Valuable...If You Don't Know Your Values? - Martial Arts | Karate

This blog was duplicated with permission from the author. Have a look at the original post and more by visiting Tiffany’s FaceBook Page.

𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐀𝐫𝐞 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐆𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐊𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭’𝐬 𝐕𝐚𝐥𝐮𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞… 𝐢𝐟 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐃𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐊𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐕𝐚𝐥𝐮𝐞𝐬?

I drove a BMW.

Lived in a phatass apartment.

Was the skinniest/healthiest I’d ever been.

Traveled. Was sober. Had lots of money. Amazing Career.

But I remember as I was wandering around the small town of Terceria in the Azores Islands, I had this overwhelming feeling of “Is this it?”

I’d come so far and overcome so much, yet I didn’t feel fulfilled.

What the hell was wrong with me?

Then a little less than three months later… I found out I was pregnant.

I did NOT want to have kids but a wise friend of mine told me to go home and just think about it.

I absolutely couldn’t find a reason not to go through with it, so I made the decision to keep my son despite the tumultuous relationship I was having with his father.

Fast forward four years later and I see now what my problem was.

No… not that I was missing out on the “blessing of motherhood” because that shit is HARD.

But there’s something about having a child that makes you start asking yourself deeper questions.

Alongside my personal development, I started to grow in ways I’d never thought I could.

And through this growth, I began to recognize that I’d been living with the values of “someone” else.

I was accumulating things and experiences that I’d only heard and assumed would fulfill me, but in actuality, had no real value.

You see, until we get clear on what we value in life, we’re never going to know how to show up for it in the ways that make us happy.

You don’t just say to yourself “I’m gonna go on vacation” and then hop in the car and start driving without a destination.

In life, our values are our destination and if you’re not clear on where you’re going, you’re destined to wander around this life accomplishing things without ever really feeling accomplished.

Example:

𝐇𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐝𝐚𝐲?

What do you value more? Having nice things, the comfort of familiarity and security, or having the courage to pursue what makes you happy?

𝐃𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐤𝐢𝐝𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭?

What do you value more? Being the nice parent or developing your child into a functional part of society?

𝐔𝐧𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲 𝐢𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩𝐬?

What do you value more? The safety in being silent or having firm, self-serving boundaries so people know how to treat you?

The more familiar you are with your values, the easier it is to take the steps to move towards them every day.

Values have to do with the following…

How people treat you

How you treat yourself

How you treat others

The relationships you have

The career you choose

The home you have

The money you make

The car you drive

The people you have in your life

It all has to do with what you value. Helpful hint: If you feel obligated to do it… it ain’t a value.But getting clear on what you value isn’t quite enough. No… you must also get into action. Because values without action are just aspirations. And aspirations are like Edible Arrangements… they sound like a really good idea but always end up secretly abandoned in a neighbor’s garbage.So, if you’re looking for the fuel to get you started or move you through discomfort or to make a change, revisit your values and I guarantee you’ll find a spark there.Have the day you deserve.

This is Sensei Almonte Covington. When you have moment, pay Tiffany a visit on her FaceBook group: A Professional Woman’s Guide to Becoming a Confident Leader. We look forward to hearing more from Ms. Tiffany!!

How Are You Going to Know What’s Valuable…If You Don’t Know Your Values?

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