I’m not doing karate for a black belt.
Wait, what?
Okay, okay, yes, I want to advance. Yes, I want to improve and become more skilled in my art.
Yes, I want to learn.
But I’m not doing karate for a black belt.
I’m in my third year of karate, and what I’m discovering is that, much like yoga, tai chi, and meditation, martial arts is not a goal-oriented practice. You never really get there. The more you learn, the less you know. There is no such thing as good, better, best. And if you try to go too fast, you miss stuff. A lot of stuff.
When I pursued karate as a goal-oriented path, my heart and spirit suffered with every class. Pushing and pressuring myself created injuries, competition, and the death of joy. When other people advanced, and I didn’t, it caused frustration and uncertainty. Eventually, I had to make a choice. I could either take pride in my journey and let it unfold in its own way and time, or I could continue pushing and pressing and cause myself a lot of angst.
Letting go of the goal of becoming a black belt resulted in a lot more room to breathe. I now do karate for the journey. I do it for the camaraderie and friendships. I do it because it challenges me to stretch and grow beyond my accepted limits, beyond my beliefs about myself, beyond what I think I can do.
Karate connects me with my spirit and asks me to dig deep on the hard days and be humble on the good days. It asks me to just show up when the last thing I feel like doing is going to class. It asks me to try, and try, and try again, and never give up. It asks me to show up, for myself and others.
I’m learning to be strong and confident. I’m learning to help others on their way. I’m learning the art of stillness in motion and how to go slow enough to notice the subtle glimmers, insights, and sparkles that are hidden along the path.
Someday, I’ll get my black belt. But in the meantime, I’m glad to be where I am. I’m enjoying the journey, enjoying the path. By taking my time and not being goal oriented, I gain the fullness of the experience, the luxury of paying attention, the richness of finding the secrets hidden in plain sight. I don’t mind being a lowly blue belt. There’s a great gift in that. I’m discovering the power of humility and an open heart and mind. That’s where I want to be.
When I arrive at black belt, I know I’ll arrive with my heart and my spirit intact. I’ll know who I am, where I’ve been, the mettle I’m made of, and that I did my best. I’ll have pride in my journey.
Sharon Lynn
Kosho School of Karate
Other Thoughts by Sharon on her journey:
Stepping Stones
A Walk in the Woods
Encouraging blog!