This isn’t a question- these are observations.
I’m not looking for advice to solve a problem.
I’m sharing some thoughts.
It’s not a gripe thread – it’s a series of observations and trends over the last 11 months.
BACKGROUND:
I see that the lockdowns, isolation, online learning, death of coworkers/friends/family members, social anxiety, and the endless cycle of crazy in society (just watch the news) is directly impacting people in very negative and unhealthy ways.
OBSERVATIONS & TRENDS:
People are quite honestly… less resilient.
The thread about the six year old and the parents looking for a school owner to play the adult in the room for them is great example of maladaptive behaviors. Those are the parents- they seem to feel defeated before they even wake up when it comes to setting boundaries and expectations with a very young child.
There is more complaining, less personal accountability, and more excuses for succumbing to a lack of self awareness and emotional intelligence.
SETTING THE BAR:
I also think that we have to (as school owners) NOT give too much latitude to these behaviors as they are toxic and run counter to the cultures we are looking to create.
“Give a mouse a cookie- and he’ll ask for a glass of milk.”
Don’t lower your bar – or your expectations – just because it’s easier to go along / get along and give in than to dig in.
I covered this last night in all of my classes and true to form, the “80/20” rule was in full demonstration (where 20% are 80% of the issues and 80% are only 20% of the issues. In my school, it’s like 98/2… but still). The message about showing personal best, being respectful to others, and giving maximum effort was met by the folks who struggle with those concepts the most… with some resistance… that we shut down quickly (and no, I’m not letting exceptions turn what should simply be a “no” answer from me into a 25 minute mat chat on a rabbit hole comment about why someone feels a certain way in the beginning of a class. There is a time and place to address feelings with significant dialogue – and the beginning of a class is not one of them.)IMPLICATIONS:
I also believe that the struggles experienced over the last 10 months more broadly in society are amplifying maladaptive behaviors.
Complainers complain more.
People who struggle with showing respect to others are struggling more.
People who lack self-awareness and EI are lacking more.
ENDSTATE:
I have high expectations for how people behave.
I have to – we are teaching things that could be used in ways that could hurt, injure, or cripple other people. And that’s why the right kind of personal character – respect for others, not being a hot head, and not using violence as a “go to” to solve problems – is vitally important.
Take these for what they are worth. Again… observations.
It’s not a complaint thread but rather food for thought in a time of great change. Don’t let your guard down. Be the change you want to see by NOT managing to exceptions to run YOUR program. There is a difference between “managing to exceptions” and “managing the exceptions”.
Thank you for your time.
Johnny Bakane